My Chemical Truth or Dare
by envysparkler
Summary: The hottest new show on the block! Join me and my friends for the hit TV show, My Chemical Truth or Dare, starring the IE Cast! You thought the hilarity and craziness had ended with Meme World, but it's back, and here to stay. Enter only if you dare...MY. CHEMICAL. TRUTH. OR. DARE!
1. Episode 1: Preview

**Episode 1: Preview**

_Three Indian girls and one Indian boy enter the room. One girl has black hair in a side pony, is wearing a blood red sleeveless, knee-length dress and a silver bracelet, and has a bright smile. Another is short, has black flowing shoulder-length hair, is wearing a dark green sleeveless knee-length dress with a gold necklace and has a murderous expression. The third has curly black hair let loose, with a purple clip holding back her right bangs, and is wearing a purple sleeveless, knee-length dress with a copper ring on her right middle finger and is glaring at the first girl. The boy has black hair in a buzz cut and is wearing a Lakers jersey and basketball shorts with a disgruntled_ _expression._

_The girl in red steps forward into the spotlight._

NaCl: Yo, minna-san! Welcome to My Chemical Truth or Dare!

Audience: …

NaCl: (frowns and looks upward) Lights, please!

_The lights are switched on and reveal…some sleeping girls and boys…_

NaCl: (vein popping) YOU BAKAHEADS, WAKE UP AND GO TO THE BACK ROOM! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE SO NEAR TO THE AUDIENCE!

Fudou: (looks around him and smirks) What audience?

NaCl: Uh…they'll get here…GO TO THE BACK ROOM!

IE Cast: (glares at Writer-chan and goes to the back room)

NaCl: Now that's taken care of… (gets interrupted by girl in purple)

Unknown-san Purple: What? I came all the way here and there's no audience? NaCl!

NaCl: (sweatdrop) Um…3.14…weren't you glad to get out of tuitions?

3.14: Yes…but still, there should be a good reason why I'm ditching Veena Rao…my parents will kill me when I get back!

Unknown-san Green: That's goes for me too! Do you realize that we're wasting valuable study time! We are in tenth after all, and board exams are no joke!

NaCl: Stop being such a nerd, P.H., you should take a break from studying, our board exams aren't for another five months!

P.H.: And you should stop being so carefree about exams, NaCl!

3.14: Wait…this is revenge for making up the nickname NaCl, isn't it?

NaCl: (grins evilly) Of course!

Burn: (pokes his head out of the back room) Writer-chan and random freaks, can you stop arguing and get on with it? The back room's getting a bit crowded…

3.14 & P.H.: WE ARE NOT RANDOM FREAKS!

Lil bro: Why am I here? I was having so much fun playing b-ball till you dragged me for your TV show!

NaCl: Oh, stop whining! (turns to non-existent audience) Welcome to My Chemical Truth or Dare! Me, P.H., 3.14, and my lil bro are the co-hosts for this fabulous TV show! Please send in some truth and dares, as what could be better than torturing the IE Cast?

Burn: (pokes his head out of the back room again) I could think of a hundred things…

NaCl: (ignores him) Thanks you for watching! And stay tuned for the next episode of My Chemical Truth or Dare!


	2. Episode 2: Gods, Kisses, Cheese

**Episode 2: Gods, Kisses and Cheese**

_Lights are switched on…to reveal NaCl, P.H., 3.14, lil bro, and two other Indian girls, one jumping up and down in excitement and wearing a light blue dress, the other staring sullenly at the floor and wearing a dark red dress. NaCl steps out into the spotlight, a disgruntled expression on her face._

NaCl: (glaring at the two unknown-sans) Welcome to the second episode of My Chemical Truth or Dare! We have received some truths and dares, so I'd like to thank the awesome people who have submitted them! Oh and before we start…

Lil bro: (sighs) Onee-chan doesn't own IE, she kidnapped the cast, and is not sponsored by Level-5.

NaCl: Now on with the- (gets interrupted by girl in light blue)

Unknown-san Light Blue: Aren't you forgetting something?

NaCl: (sighs) These are my other insane friends, (points to girl in blue) this is Juice, (points to girl in dark red) and this is AuS.

Juice & AuS: WE ARE NOT INSANE!

Lil bro: (mutters) Yes, you are…

NaCl: (glaring at co-hosts and IE cast) Now on with the show! Our first batch of dares have come from the one and only, **Kitkatcocoa222**!

Audience: (applauds)

Fudou: (pokes his head out of the back door) Wow…she actually got an audience…

P.H.: And the first dare is… _'Fudou and Sakuma tightrope across the room, fighting for Haruna's love. Of course they're on each ends of the tightrope; one has to be pushed off in the end.'_

NaCl: Fudou! Sakuma! Get your butts over here!

_With difficulty, Fudou and Sakuma extract themselves from the back room,_

Fudou: What?

3.14: (grins evilly) You both have to fight on a tightrope for Haruna's love!

Fudou & Sakuma: WHAT?

Juice: Do it…or else…(shows three-inch long, sharpened nails)

Sakuma: (gulps) But…I don't even like Haruna…

NaCl: Oh, just do it! (pushes Fudou and Sakuma to opposite ends of a tightrope that has suddenly appeared in midair and hands them penguin plushies, which again appeared from midair)

Fudou & Sakuma: (climb on and start fighting with penguin plushies, trying to keep their balance)

P.H.: Go Fudou!

Juice: Go Sakuma!

Kidou: (dark aura) How I wish both of them fell off and broke their necks…

3.14: NaCl…how did the tightrope suddenly appear out of nowhere?

NaCl: Oh, this is my imagination room…anything I think will appear…

3.14: (evil smile) You can even make the rope disappear?

NaCl: Of course! See, like this…(closes eyes)

_One second later, the rope and penguin plushies disappear, making Fudou and Sakuma fall to the ground…_

Fudou & Sakuma: OW!

Kidou: (evil smile) Yes!

P.H. & Juice: (slowly turn to 3.14, murderous expressions on their faces)

3.14: (slowly backing away) Um…truce?

AuS: (ignores them) The next dare is… _'Aphrodi! Cut your hair and say nothing about god, angel, heaven, or anything related to that for the whole chapter.'_

NaCl: Oh, Aphrodi~

Aphrodi: (comes out of back room and almost gets trampled by 3.14 who is running away from P.H. and Juice) What?

NaCl: (smiles sweetly) You have to cut off your hair and say nothing god-related for the whole chapter~

Aphrodi: Sure…wait, what?

NaCl: Too late! (shoves him to the corner of the room, where a barber is waiting) Remember, if you say anything god-related, I'll throw you to your fangirls!

AuS: While Aphrodi is getting his haircut, 3.14 is busy running away from P.H. and Juice, we'll move on to the next dare! Which is… _'Fudou, shave the other side of your mohawk, or dye it pink.'_

Fudou: (still lying on the floor) ANYTHING BUT PINK! THEN I'LL LOOK LIKE SOMEOKA!

NaCl: (looks at Fudou) He kinda can't move…and the barber is busy…

Kidou: (evil smile) Let me do this…

_A surprised NaCl tosses him a bottle of hair dye. A few minutes later,_

Fudou: NO! WHY PINK! I HATE YOU, COCOA-SAN!

AuS: Um, NaCl…that wasn't temporary dye, was it?

NaCl: (evil smile) Of course…not!

AuS: You are evil…Oh, and the next dare is…(bursts out laughing)

P.H.: (stops running) What's so funny? (Looks at dare…and also starts laughing)

AuS: Hahaha… _'Kidou, take off your goggles, wear bunny ears, find a blazer, and start worrying about time. Midorikawa, dress up like Alice, in Alice in Wonderland.'_

Kidou & Midorikawa: WHAT? WE ARE SO NOT DOING THAT!

Juice: (stops running and examines her nails) What was that?

Kidou & Midorikawa: (gulp) We'll…gladly do it…

_Kidou and Midorikawa go to the bathroom. When they come out, Kidou looks like the White Rabbit and Midorikawa looks exactly like Alice…_

NaCl: (laughing her head off) Haha…sweet revenge…Midori-chan in a dress!

3.14: (starry eyed) Kya~ Aww, you look so kawaii in a dress, Ryuuji-kun!

Fudou: (almost crying from laughing too much) Kidou…in a bunny costume…priceless!

P.H.: Next…we can see Aphrodi with his haircut!

_The spotlight shines on Aphrodi, who has a murderous expression…and a buzz cut…_

3.14: Now, you really do look like a dumb blonde!

Aphrodi: I am not a dumb blonde, I am a go- (falls silent at NaCl's eager expression)…never mind…

P.H.: (wiping away tears from laughing so hard) Now, the final dare! _'Since Aphrodi can't act all high and mighty, god-like, Hiroto act like former Aphrodi for the rest of the chapter.'_

NaCl: WHAT?

3.14: (fake sweet voice) Oh, Hero-kun~

Hiroto: (comes out of back room) What?

3.14: (fake sweet voice) You have to act like Aphrodi for the rest of the chapter~

Hiroto: WHAT?

Burn: Oh, do it. It's not as if it's such a stretch, you're already self-centered, it's just moving from an alien to a god…

Hiroto: Fine!

Juice: (hyper) And the first truth is… _'Kidou, if Fudou or Sakuma marries Haruna, what would you do at their wedding?'_

Kidou: Umm…if she's happy…I'm okay with it…but if she's sad…I will go and murder them…but I'm fine with her marrying Sakuma…

Fudou: WHAT? How do you show more preference for eyepatch?

Juice: (waving nails threateningly) You have a problem with his eyepatch, baldie?

Fudou: Um…no…

NaCl: Next truth! _'Kazemaru: How does your hair stay in that perfect position for every single freaking game, do you even have an eye under there?'_

Kazemaru: Gel…lots of gel…and hairspray also…and of course I have an eye! (flips his bangs up) See?

3.14: Next truth! _'Burn, Gazel, Hiroto, Midorikawa, Desarm, Heat, reveal to us your secret hobby!'_

Burn: (blushing) Um…I…

Gazel: He likes to stalk AuS-san.

Everyone else: WHAT?

Burn: (face as red as his hair) Oh, yeah, well you collect pictures of Victoria's Secret models!

Gazelle: (face as red as Burn's hair) How…how did you find out?

Hiroto: I, the mightiest of the gods, like to look upon and grace the most beautiful of mortals with my presence!

Aphrodi: I DO NOT TALK LIKE THAT!

NaCl: Translation, please.

Aphrodi: (fuming) He says that he likes looking at you and being with you…

NaCl: (blushes as red as Hiroto's hair) Mov…moving on…

Desarm: My secret hobby is reading encyclopedias!

Maquia: So that's where he got all those big words, Maquia always wondered…

Heat: My secret hobby is stalking Rean.

Burn: WHAT? YOU PERV, I AM SO KICKING YOU OFF THE TEAM!

Gazel: The pot calling the kettle black…

P.H.: Last truth from Cocoa-chan! _'Kidou, would you rather give up Haruna to Fudou, or walk around town with nothing but underwear on?'_

Kidou: (thinking hard) Hmm…maybe…no…(Fudou is hanging on to every word)…(sighs)…if it's what my sister truly wants, I'll give her to Fudou…and then buy a pair of fake nails like Juice-chan and go after him!

Juice: THESE ARE NOT FAKE!

AuS: (shudders) Believe me, they're not!

NaCl: (looks around the room to see chaos at every corner, turns back to the audience and smiles) We will have a short commercial break while we sort out a few technical difficulties! Lights off!

Lights are switched back on, and shine on a now pristine room, with the five girls and one boy standing in the middle of the stage, looking spotless.

NaCl: It's amazing how fast an imagination room cleans itself!

Lil bro: I agree…I need to get one of these.

NaCl: (notices lights are on and turns to the now full audience) Commercial break is over and all technical difficulties have been fixed! Now, on to the next batch of truth and dare we have received from the wonderful **Shizuka Amaterasu**! Unfortunately Axelle-san is busy, so she sent in her OC, Shizuka Amaterasu, to take her place as a guest star!

_A girl with black hair in a duck butt, red eyes, and wearing the Zeus Junior High uniform enters and smiles and waves at the audience._

Shizuka: It's nice to be on this fabulous TV show! I'm sure we'll all have a fun time!

Burn: (pokes his head out the back door) Fun isn't the word I'd use…

Shizuka: First truth! _'Kazemaru, why do you want to look like a girl?'_

Kazemaru: (glares) I DO NOT WANT TO LOOK LIKE A GIRL! IT'S CALLED FASHION, EVER HEARD OF IT, EMO?

Shizuka: (dark aura) What…did…you…just…call…me?

Kazemaru: (glares) EMO!

Shizuka: (chases Kazemaru) You are going to die, Kaze-chan!

Kazemaru: SOMEBODY SAVE ME!

3.14: (ignores him) Next truth! _'Endou, what would you to if soccer was not even invented?'_

Endou: But…soccer has been invented…

P.H.: (sighs) Just answer the question!

Endou: (thinking hard) Um…

Burn: (smirks) He'll probably finally choose between Aki, Natsumi, Touko and Fuyuka!

Endou: (still thinking) Uh…

AuS: (sweatdrop) We'll move on to the next truth… _'Hiroto, neko-mini haircut?'_

Hiroto: NO WAY!

NaCl: (pouts) But you look cute in a neko-mini haircut, Hero-kun…

Hiroto: (blushes) Oh…well…yes…I guess…

NaCl: (trying to cover her blush) Next truth! _'Tsunami, surfing or your pink hair?'_

Tsunami: Uh…dude, I want to keep both!

Touko: I think your pink hair looks tacky…

Tsunami: …I changed my mind…I choose surfing…

Shizuka: Aww…you couples are so cute! Especially NaCl-san and Hiroto!

NaCl: (glares at her) Excuse me…?

P.H.: Um…let's move on…next truth is… _'Fudou, why do you like a mohawk?'_

Fudou: (evil smile) Because it irritated Kidou-kun!

Everyone else: (sweatdrop) That's…that's the only reason?

Fudou: Of course not! Also, Haruna and P.H.-chan think its cute!

Kidou: (dark aura) You…are…cheating…on my sister? (lunges at Fudou)

Fudou: AAH! HELP ME!

_NaCl waves her hand and a cage appears around a murderous Kidou…_

NaCl: Kya~ You're sooo kawaii when you're overprotective when you're overprotective~

Lil bro: (sweatdrop) Playgirl…

Shizuka: (too innocent smile) On to the dares! The first one is… _'I dare NaCl to make-out with her crush'_

NaCl: (sputters) EXCUSE ME!

Hiroto: It would be my honor!

Aphrodi: Again! I do not talk like that!

_Hiroto sweeps NaCl in for a kiss. After a minute-long make-out session…_

P.H.: Ahem…we still have a lot of dares to finish…

NaCl: (breaks apart from Hiroto, blushing as red as his hair) Oh…right…on with the show!

Hiroto: (blows kiss to audience/TV camera) My thanks to Axelle-san!

Fangirls: (faint as they try to catch his kiss)

3.14: Next dare! '_I dare hosts and guest stars to kiss their rival'_

Hosts & Guest-stars: WHAT?

Lil bro: Ladies first!

NaCl: Why, Axelle-san? (glares and goes over to kiss a surprised Midorikawa) I hate you, Midori-chan!

Midorikawa: MY NAME IS NOT MIDORI-CHAN!

Lil bro: I hate you, Axelle-san! (goes and kisses Yuuka)

Gouenji: WHAT THE HELL? MY LITTLE SISTER!

P.H.: I hate this dare… (goes and kisses Sakuma)

Sakuma: I'm your rival?

P.H.: Yes you are, eyepatch!

Juice: (goes and kisses Fudou with a murderous expression) That was the first and last time, baldie!

3.14: I don't even know you, Axelle! (goes and kisses Hiroto)

AuS: (glares at the TV camera/audience and kisses Gazel)

Gazel: WHAT?

Shizuka: I never thought I would say this but…I HATE YOU AXELLE! (goes and kisses Aphrodi) I HATE YOU!

Aphrodi: (smirks) I hate you too!

3.14: (wipes her mouth) Next dare! _'I dare the whole Teikoku to do Caramelldansen!'_

Teikoku: (does carmelldansen)

Kogure: (holding a camera) This is so going on Youtube!

Juice: Um…on with the show? Next dare… _'I dare NaCl to act all girly for 4 chapters (Don't skip or I will come with a .357 and two desert eagles.)'_

NaCl: WHAT?

3.14: (sweatdrop) Desert eagles?

NaCl: Um…sorry Axelle-san…but I forgot to mention the rules of the show…

1. No yaoi or yuri except for Burn/Gazel

2. This is a T-RATED TV show

3. Do not send in M-Rated dares/truths

4. NO dares involving other shows I haven't read/watched.

5. NO multi-episode dares!

Axelle: (appears out of nowhere) AND WHY NOT?

NaCl: Umm…I have a lot of stories and won't remember…and I take all the truths and dares submitted for two days so the episodes are really long…

Axelle: Fine…but do it for a whole episode! Otherwise…(shows a .357 and two desert eagles and disappears)

3.14: Again, what's with the desert eagles?

NaCl: I have to act girly…

Juice: Next dare! _'I dare Tsunami to eat carrots while bungee-jumping off Mount Everest.'_

Tsunami: WHY CARROTS?

P.H.: (sweatdrop) Shouldn't you be more worried about the bungee-jumping part?

NaCl: Come on, you, like, have to, like, go to, like, Mount Everest! So bubbly~

Lil bro: (laughing hard) This…is…priceless!

NaCl: (opens door and outside is Mount Everest, hands Tsunami a bungee cord and a carrot) Here's your bungee cord! This is going to be, like, totally amazing!

Lil bro: How did…right, this is an imagination room!

NaCl: You are totally brain-missing!

_Tsunami stuffs the carrot in his mouth and jumps off Mount Everest._

Lil bro: (holds up other end of bungee cord) Um, onee-chan you forgot to tie this to something…

NaCl: (tosses her hair) Like, what~ever~

AuS: And the next dare is… _'I dare Fudou to eat bananas for the whole chapter'_

Lil bro: Well, Fudou?

NaCl: (hands him a big bucket full of bananas)

Fudou: (starts eating them)

Shizuka: Ahem! I feel like I'm being ignored over here! (notices nobody's paying any attention to her) Fine! Next dare! _'I dare Edgar to kiss Shizuka'_ Wait, WHAT?

NaCl: Oh, Edgar~

Edgar: (comes in and kisses Shizuka in a gentlemanly way)

Shizuka: (faints)

NaCl: (pours ice-cold water on Shizuka)

Shizuka: (wakes up) Isn't this episode over yet?

Lil bro: Nope! And the last dare from Axelle-san is… _'I dare Hiroto to kiss his true love.'_

Hiroto: My true love? Although I am a god, my true love is a mortal…

Aphrodi: I'm not even going to bother…

Hiroto: My true love is…(gets down on one knee) NaCl!

NaCl: (faints)

Juice: (notices the total disorder) Um…commercial break? We need to revive our co-host so we'll be right back! Lights off!

_The lights switch back on…and the six hosts are standing with an unknown boy, in the middle of the now neat room, the IE cast safely stowed away in the overcrowded back room…_

NaCl: (curtsies) Hello and welcome back to the second episode of My Chemical Truth or Dare! This new batch of truths and dares are totally icy! This time is submitted by **Dylan-Made-User**! He has agreed to come and guest star for this episode!

Dylan: Yo! What's up?

NaCl: Let's like, totally, start, like, the show!

Dylan: Yup! First truth is… _**'**__Who likes cheese?'_

Everyone: Um…nobody…random freak…

Dylan: I AM NOT A RANDOM FREAK!

NaCl: You, like, totally are~

Lil bro: That's starting to get a little creepy…

Burn: A little? A LOT!

Dylan: They're suited for each other…NaCl-san has to act girly and Hiroto has to act god-like…

P.H.: Ahem…next truth… _'Who are your crushes?'_…wait, WHAT?

Aki: Ichinose~

Ichinose: Aki…

Rika: Darling~

Edgar: (sweatdrop) Playboy…

NaCl: Like…totally Hiroto!

Hiroto: The most gracing among mortals…NaCl!

Natsumi: Endou!

Endou: …

Haruna: Fudou~

Kidou: WHAT?

Touko: Tsunami~

Tsunami: Touko…

Lil bro: Haruna…

Kidou: WHAT?

Dylan: Now that's over…next truth! _'Why didn't Tobitaka change his hair?'_

Tobitaka: Because I didn't feel like it, baka!

3.14: Um…o…kay…next truth! _'P.H.-san, who is your crush?'_

P.H.: WHAT? WHAT KIND OF A TRUTH IS THAT?

Lil bro: God, just tell us…

P.H.: (blushes) …um…Fudou…

Fudou: (mouth full of bananas) Really?

AuS: Last truth! _'Once again, who likes cheese?'_

Everyone: (sweatdrop) Nobody…and we don't think it changed in the five minutes it took to get between truths…

Juice: On with the show! Our first dare is… _'I dare Burn and Gazel to kiss.'_

Burn & Gazel & AuS: WHAT?

Burn: Don't worry, AuS, it's just a dare…

Gazel: JUST A DARE? AFTER THE MENTAL SCARRING I HAVE TO ENDURE?

NaCl: (rubbing her temples and looking murderous) JUST DO IT, ALREADY!

_Burn and Gazel kiss for five seconds and pull away quickly, wiping their lips off…_

NaCl: Like…the next dare…ohhhh~

Everyone else: WHAT IS IT?

NaCl: (grins evilly) The next dare… _'I dare 3.14 to kiss her crush'_

3.14: WHAT?

NaCl: (still grinning evilly, pushes 3.14 onto Midorikawa who kiss) First and last time I'm helping you, Midori-chan!

Lil bro: (rolls eyes) Next dare is to… _'I dare NaCl to dance to a random song'_

NaCl: (stops grinning evilly) WHAT?

Midorikawa: (evil smile) To make it easy for you, I chose a song!

_Midorikawa puts the disc into a CD player and presses Play. The song Ready for Love by Cascada comes on. NaCl starts dancing…_

Hiroto: I am flabbergasted…I never knew…that she could dance with the grace of Aphrodite!

NaCl: (stops dancing) I am so not doing that again!

Lil bro: (grins) Looks like it's the end of Episode 2: Gods, Kisses, and Cheese!

NaCl: Yes, I can stop acting girly!

Hiroto: And I can stop acting like a god!

Aphrodi: God, angel, heaven~ God, angel, heaven~

Everyone else: (sweatdrop)

Fudou: (stomach bloated) I can finally stop eating bananas!

NaCl: Thank you for watching and I hope it brought a smile to your lips! Please send in more dares! Stay tuned for the next episode of My Chemical Truth or Dare!


	3. Episode 3: Searing Flames

**Episode 3: Searing Flames!**

_The spotlight on our favorite TV show switches on and reveals the six hosts standing in the middle of the imagination room, beaming smiles on their face, while a boy with a blonde buzz cut (Hmm sounds like Aphrodi) is standing with them, grinning from ear to ear. Occasional sounds are heard from the back room like, "Get off me Burn! I'm not AuS and you have no right to be in that position with her also!" or "Hiroto, stop dreaming about NaCl and help me!" or "Fudou I will kill you! You like my little sister and that stupid host? PLAYBOY!" With each of these comments, the hosts' smiles decrease…until they have murderous expressions…_

NaCl: (steps forward with a strained smile) Welcome to the third episode of My Chemical Truth or Dare, the hottest new TV show with the hottest new hosts! Where anything can happen, and the dares border on insanity! I hope you kill yourselves laughing over this new batch of truths and dares cuz they are hil-ar-io-us!

Lil bro: (sweatdrop) Kill yourselves laughing? Remind me to not sit next to you for lunch…

NaCl: (dark aura) This batch of dares was submitted by the talented **Hibisha**! Who, if you're listening, really need to update Forbidden Force…

Lil bro: Oh I almost forgot! Onee-chan doesn't own Inazuma Eleven which belongs to the genius Level-5, and the content showed in this show are not suited for children under the age of 12, aka, are not corrupted…

NaCl: Yes! Oh, and we have a guest star (points to unknown) this is Miruuji Emii-kun! And he will be joining us for another wonderful session of My…Chemical…Truth…or…Dare!

_The audience's cheers, wolf whistles and stomping nearly bring the house down. However, a certain horrified voice cuts through the commotion…_

Unknown: OMG! HIROTO! BURN! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TWO ARE SUCH PERVS! JUST WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE PG+ PICTURES OF NACL AND AUS?

Hiroto & Burn: …

Everyone: (stares at door to back room)

NaCl: (trying, unsuccessfully to get everyone's attention and cover her blush) Um…peoples? The show? The first dare is… _'I dare Endou to shave his head bald.'_

Lil bro: OI! Soccer baka! Come out!

Endou: (comes out looking disgusted and creeped out) I did so not want to see that…Burn really is perverted…(notices everyone staring at him) What?

NaCl: (staring quizzically at him) Um…you have to shave your head bald…

Endou: Okay! (skips to the corner where the barber is)

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

Endou: What? Even you would be glad to get out off the room of perverts…

P.H.: Next dare! _'I dare Hiroto to jump on one leg for 5 solid hours.'_

NaCl: WHY HERO-KUN?

Hiroto: (comes out looking disgusted and creeped out) That Burn…

P.H.: You have to jump on one leg for five hours…

Hiroto: WHAT?

Juice: (blows a speck of dust off her fingernails)

Hiroto: (gulps) Fine…

_One minute later…_

P.H.: GOD THIS IS TAKING TOO LONG!

Hiroto: (jumping)

NaCl: (light bulb) I know! I'll go in the future to five hours from now!

Miruuji Emii: Can you do that?

NaCl: If a descendant of Endou and Natsumi can do it, so can I!

_Fast forward to four hours and fifty eight minutes later…_

NaCl: 3…2…1…you can stop!

Hiroto: (stops jumping and collapses)

NaCl: (faints)

Miruuji: This didn't go well…

3.14: Um…I'll say the next dare! _'I dare Kazemaru to bake a prank cake filled with Tabasco sauce and feed it to Burn.'_

Kazemaru: WHAT?

Kogure: (drags him to the kitchen in another corner) Ushishishi, I'll help you!

_Ten minutes later,_

3.14: Oh, Burn~

Burn: What? Oh and I did NOT take perverted pictures of AuS, Hiroto was lying!

Everyone: (stares at him)

3.14: No, it's not that…Kazemaru has to feed you a cake…

Burn: (instantly brightens up) CAKE?

_Kazemaru feeds him the cake and runs away, the platter held protectively over his head while waiting for Burn to explode…_

Burn: (finishes cake) OMG! THAT WAS AWESOME CAKE!

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

Lil bro: Umm…it didn't taste…different?

Burn: (thinking hard) Now that you mention it…I think it was a little sweeter than usual…did Kazemaru put too much sugar?

Juice: Okay…you're officially creeping me out…and that's not including the certain pictures of my best friend…

AuS: (as red as Burn's hair) Next dare…? _'I dare Gazel to go and try to freeze the entire Pacific Ocean or eat ten pounds of the hottest jalapeno peppers known to man (or alien)._

Gazel: WHAT?

P.H.: So? Which one are you going to choose?

Gazel: I'll freeze the Pacific Ocean…

_The imagination room door opens and shows miles of undulating waves of bluish green seawater. Gazel saunters forward and takes a soccer ball and kicks it with a 'Northern Impact!' and ice spreads from the point of impact. Ten seconds later, the Pacific Ocean is frozen into a block of ice._

Gazel: That was easy!

3.14: (sweatdrop) Um…yeah…well, back to the show…the next dare is-

_The TV screens set up on either side of the stage start beeping and glowing red. A tinny, recorded voice comes on…_

Weird voice: We are sorry to interrupt this broadcast, but we bring a warning bulletin. The Pacific Ocean is frozen over, I repeat, the Pacific Ocean is frozen over. It's over folks, THE WORLD IS GOING TO END! PREPARE YOURSELVES FOR THE JUDGEMENT!

_There is silence on the stage and in the audience. Then, silently, everyone turns to look at Gazel._

Gazel: What? IT WAS A DARE!

AuS: Burn…your Atomic Flare is required…

_Burn takes the soccer ball and uses Atomic Flare on the ice, which promptly melts. Ten seconds later, the same voice comes back on…_

Weird voice: Um…apparently, as you can see, the world hasn't ended and the Pacific Ocean is back to its normal state…we are sorry for interrupting this broadcast.

3.14: (glaring at the weird voice….wait, WHAT?) As I was saying, the next dare is… _'I dare Fudou to kiss Natsumi.'_

Fudou: WHAT?

Natsumi: EWW!

Haruna & P.H.: (dark aura) WHAT?

Kidou: (dark aura) With how many girls are you cheating on my little sister?

Natsumi: I DO NOT WANT TO KISS BALDIE!

Juice: Just do it, you hyped up Barbie doll!

Natsumi: WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?

Juice: SO YOU THINK YOU'RE NOT A BEAUTY QUEEN?

Fudou: Ladies, ladies, you're both beautiful, please stop fighting!

Natsumi & Juice: (turn and yell at Fudou) GET OUT OF HERE, BALDIE!

Kidou: (raises eyes threateningly) Just how many girls do you call beautiful in a day?

Fudou: (arrogant grin) Wouldn't you want to know, goggles…

Natsumi & Juice: (still cat fighting)

Miruuji: Natsumi, Juice, please ladies, you're both pretty, now let's GET ON WITH THE SHOW!

Natsumi & Juice: (stop fighting and look at Miruuji)

Fudou: How come they stop for him and not for me?

Kidou: Cuz…you're too rude and too much of a playboy…

3.14: (losing temper) MY GOD, JUST KISS, IT ISN'T THE END OF THE WORLD!

Fudou: (glares at 3.14 and kisses Natsumi)

Natsumi: EWW! (wipes mouth)

Miruuji: (dark aura) Must…kill…Fudou…must…kill…Fudou…

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

Juice: Next dare! _'I dare Gouenji to go sit in the refrigerator in his under pants with the cold meter on so high that even Gazelle feels cold!'_

3.14: Don't we need a refrigerator?

_A refrigerator appears…_

Gouenji: I AM NOT DOING THAT!

Juice: Is it cold enough, Gazel?

Gazel: (poking his head inside fridge and shivering) Y-y-y-yes-es-es-es!

Gouenji: I AM NOT DOING THAT!

Juice: (examining nails) Yes, you are.

Gouenji: (gulps) Fine…

_Gouenji is thrown into the fridge wearing Chimchar underwear and the door is closed, effectively cutting off Gouenji's chattering teeth and cries for help…_

Miruuji: You people are evil…

P.H.: We know~

Miruuji: (looks around) Hey, where's NaCl-san?

AuS: NaCl? Now that you mention it, I haven't seen her for awhile…

Juice: Next dare! _'I dare Gazelle to go to the Sahara dessert wearing full sleeved T-shirt, two jackets and baggy jeans.'_

Gazel: WH-WHAT?

Burn: (arrogant smirk) Can you handle the red-hot flames?

_3.14 snaps her fingers and Gazel instantly is wearing a full-sleeved black T-shirt, two black leather jackets and baggy jeans._

Miruuji: HA! Gazel is wearing SLEEVES!

Gazel: (gasps) It's so hot!

Burn: (smirks) And you haven't yet met my friend, the Sahara desert!

_The imagination door opens again, this time to show the middle of the Sahara desert. The emergency sprinklers are activated as the heat washes over the room. Half the audience faint from the heat._

Everyone: (soaking wet and glaring at Gazel)

Gazel: (pants) It is sooo hot! I…need…water…

Burn: (evil smile) Let me help you with that! (pushes Gazel out and slams the door) Ushishishi!

Miruuji: (soaking wet) Glad the sprinklers stopped…that was really hot!

AuS: When are we going to take him out?

Lil bro: In five hours…

Miruuji: EVIL…where's NaCl-san? Isn't she the only one who can control her brother?

AuS: Yes, she is…ask Juice, maybe she'll know!

Juice: Ask me what?

Miruuji: Where NaCl-san is…

Juice: (evil smile) Oh, just ask Hiroto! He'll know where his lady love is!

Miruuji: Great idea! But…

Juice: But what?

Miruuji: I can't find Hiroto either…

Everyone: (realizes the implications of what Miruuji said)

Juice: Oh…My…God…

AuS: Well, there's no other possible answer! If Hiroto and NaCl are missing at the same time…

Lil bro: OI! That means she ditched the show!

3.14: Well, as NaCl would say, on with the show! Next dare! _'I dare Burn to be forced to wear a bikini and walk on the runway like a model...in front of some highly over reactive fan girls.'_

Burn: W-WHAT?

Kogure: Ushishishi…

P.H.: (evil smile) Maybe we should ask AuS to give you a bikini…

AuS: (as red as Burn's hair) W-WHAT?

Juice: (evil smile) Here it is! (holds up a fire engine red bikini and a pair of red pumps)

AuS: (even redder, if it's possible) W-WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?

_Juice throws the bikini and heels to Burn, who looks more mortified than AuS, and whose face has blended with his hair and snaps her fingers. A catwalk appears, stretching into the audience, and all Burn fangirls suddenly appear on the side of the catwalk, waving flags with his name and face…_

AuS: (dark aura) My Burn…

Burn: (kisses her on the cheek) Don't worry, it's only a dare…(dresses in bikini)

Burn fangirls: (screaming their heads off) KAWAII! KYA~ DEATH TO AUS~ SOO HOT! BURN, I LOVE YOU~

Lil bro: (covering his ears) Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…god, woman…

Aphrodi: (sneezes)

Burn: (looks around him with a pleading look)

Juice: (evil smile) Come on…(pushes him onto catwalk)

Burn: (almost falls off the catwalk in surprise) AHH!

Burn fangirls: AHH~ BURN! BURN! I LOVE YOU BURN! YOU LOOK AWESOME IN THAT TOTALLY REVEALING BIKINI~

Burn: (red) Totally revealing…!

_As Burn tries to navigate the half foot wide runway in three-inch heels, AuS's face is getting more and more murderous. As he finishes, and starts to run back, he trips and falls…right into the sea of fangirls…who carry him off…to god knows where…_

Aphrodi: HEY! I don't know where they're carrying him! Don't blame me!

Burn: AHH! HELP! AUS! NACL! JUICE! SOMEBODY! EVEN GAZEL! OR BAKA HIROTO! (gets carried out of the building)

AuS: (faints)

Miruuji: This…is a problem…

Lil bro: Don't worry! I know how to get our favorite tulip head back!

Miruuji: You do?

Lil bro: (evil smile) I'm going to call them (calls the fangirls) I'm afraid we'll need Burn for our show…what? He's unconscious? …I'm sure Burn would be delighted to give you lovely ladies an autograph when he…uh…wakes up…BUT WE NEED HIM HERE! I'M GOING TO CALL THE COPS AND TELL YOUR MOTHER THAT YOU SNUCK OUT TO COME HERE AND THAT YOU DO HAVE A BOYFRIEND AND THAT YOU DIDN'T DO YOUR HOMEWORK!

_One second later, Burn crashes through the roof, now wide awake…_

Lil bro: (snaps phone shut) It worked!

Everyone: (stares at him)

Lil bro: A combination of bribery and blackmail…onee-chan has taught me well…

Miruuji: Alright, your entire family is EVIL!

Juice: You just realized?

Burn: I'm glad you people care so much about me!

Juice: Actually we needed you for the next dare…if it was up to me, I would have left you in the…um…capable hands of those fangirls… (throws a bucket of ice water on AuS) Wakey, wakey~

AuS: (wakes up) Remind me to never ask you to wake me up!

P.H.: Oh, don't be such a baby! Next dare! _'I dare Shirou to go and punch Burn and stand there like an idiot to see the outcome...which would probably be death.'_

Miruuji: Hibisha-san! I thought you liked Fubuki-san! Or was that Zonex-san…?

Juice: I think it was Zonex…

AuS: God, Fubuki just punch him and get it over with!

Fubuki: W-WHAT? HE'LL MURDER ME!

Juice: Oh, come on! If Kidou hasn't murdered Fudou by now, there's still hope for you!

Fubuki: (brightens up) Really?

Juice: (evil smile) Sure! You might just be in the hospital for only two weeks!

Fubuki: …

3.14: JUST DO IT! The sooner you bakas finish, the sooner I GET TO GO TO SLEEP!

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

Fubuki: F-fine…

_Fubuki goes up to an oblivious Burn who is talking with AuS and not paying attention…suddenly, everyone can sense a dark aura coming from Fubuki. A strong wind blows through the room and Fubuki's bangs lift up, and his eyes change color…and he saunters up to Burn…and punches him in the face, earning Burn's attention. A sharp crack echoes around the room…_

Fubuki: (evil smile) I always wanted to do that…

Burn: (turns slowly to look at Fubuki, his face murderous, blood trickling from his nose)

_Suddenly, someone bursts through the ceiling and lands between Burn and Fubuki. He has orange hair with his bangs up and blue eyes. He turns to Fubuki with a smug smile…_

Unknown: Nii-san! There's hope for you!

Fubuki: (blinks, dark aura disappears, eyes turn back to blue, bangs fall back down) Atsuya! I thought you died!

Atsuya: Is that any way to welcome your brother?

Burn: YOU BROKE MY NOSE!

Atsuya: (turns and stares at him) Well, you're a slow one…

Burn: (ignores Atsuya and picks up a ball) You are going to feel the flames of hell!

AuS: Um…dear…that may not be such a good…

Burn: (kicking soccer ball at Fubuki) ATOMIC FLARE!

_Everyone winces as the ball hits Fubuki and slams him into the wall. He slides to the bottom and lies there, unconscious…_

Burn: There, he got what he deserved!

Atsuya: Maybe the kick will get his brain working properly! I mean, seriously, is the first thing someone says when they see their long-lost brother, 'I thought you died!'?

Everyone: (wisely doesn't answer him)

Juice: What are you doing here, pinkie?

Atsuya: Came to help you guys out! Oh, and of course to see Shirou!

3.14: Someone has their priorities straight…

Atsuya: (ignores her) Well, if you're looking for NaCl, the best bet is to look for Hiroto…

Miruuji: Thank you, Mr. Obvious!

Atsuya: Who is right there! (points to the corner where Hiroto is laying unconscious)

AuS: (trying to stop Burn's nose bleeding) God, Burn! STAY STILL!

Juice: (gets a bucket of water and dumps it on Hiroto) WHO SAID YOU COULD SLEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SHOW!

Hiroto: (wakes up) Oh, drat! This wasn't a nightmare, after all!

Burn: Oi, bakahead, there's a reason she woke you up!

Hiroto: To torture me even more? Wasn't jumping on one leg for five hours enough?

Juice: NO YOU BAKA! WE NEED OUR CO-HOST BACK!

Hiroto: So?

Atsuya: So we need you to find your beloved NaCl!

Hiroto: (stares at him) Didn't you die?

Atsuya: NO I DID NOT DIE! I WAS JUST IN A COMA FOR EIGHT YEARS!

NaCl: God, no need to act like a drama queen about it!

Everyone: (stares at her)

NaCl: What?

Juice: WHERE THE HELL DID YOU COME FROM?

NaCl: I went out to get ice cream! (shows chocolate ice cream cone) Do you know that everyone is watching this show? Even Inazuma Ice is giving away one free pass to this show with every Someoka Strawberry Special!

Someoka: SOMEOKA STRAWBERRY SPECIAL?

Kogure: Ushishishi…

Juice: (trying not to get angry) But…why…did…you…LEAVE?

NaCl: I came back didn't I?

Atsuya: THAT'S BESIDE THE POINT!

NaCl: (stares at him) Says the drama queen that's supposed to be dead!

Atsuya: I give up!

Miruuji: Now that we have found the host, we can continue! Next dare! _'I dare Someoka to go jump off the top of a 400 story building.'_

NaCl: EVIL~ I like the way you think, Hibisha-san!

Someoka: SOMEOKA STRAWBERRY SPECIAL?

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

NaCl: Apparently his brain can only process one thought at a time…

Someoka: SOMEOKA STRAWBERRY SPECIAL?

Lil bro: (cackles) Leave this to me…

_The door again opens and is now showing the excellent view from the top of a 400 story building…the lights of New York City glitter as the City that Never Sleeps gets ready for another 'sleepless' night…_

Lil bro: Is that the Empire State Building?

NaCl: Yep! Wait…it doesn't have 400 floors…it had around 300…

Lil bro: Whatever! (pushes Someoka off the building)

Someoka: SOMEOKA STRARBERRY SPE- (notices the ground rushing up to him) AHH! I'M GOING TO DIE!

_The door slams shut…_

P.H.: (massages her temples) That baka was seriously getting on my nerves…

Miruuji: Agreed…wait…what is everyone else doing?

AuS: (chasing Burn) BURN! STOP MOVING SO I CAN FIX YOUR NOSE!

3.14: (flirting with Midorikawa) Midorikawa~ You're sooo cute…especially when you leave your hair in a ponytail~

Midorikawa: (tongue-tied) Uhh…

Juice: (chasing Atsuya) 'I thought you died!'… 'I thought you died!'…

Atsuya: Nii-san! Save me!

Miruuji & NaCl & P.H.: (sweatdrop)

NaCl: Alright, who gave 3.14 and Juice Red Bull? (looks pointedly at lil bro)

Lil bro: HEY! My hands are clean in this! (examines his dirty hands) …Figuratively…

Kogure: Ushishishi!

Haruna: KOGURE-KUN!

Fudou: Stop irritating her, you little blue devil!

Desuta: (sneezes)

P.H.: (glares at Fudou) Next dare… _'I dare Natsumi to eat a piece of chicken like a cave woman.'_

Natsumi: B-BEG PARDON?

NaCl: Ushishishi…

Kogure: THOSE ARE MY LINES!

P.H.: Haha…love you, Hibisha~

Lil bro: You are truly evil… (looks at Miruuji) Hey, is there something wrong?

Miruuji: (teeth clenched, hands clenched into fists, shaking) N-no…(muttering) Must kill Hibisha…

_NaCl snaps her fingers and a chicken leg appears on a silver platter in a horrified Natsumi's hands…_

Natsumi: I AM SO NOT DOING THIS!

NaCl: GOD, WOMAN JUST EAT THE DAMN CHICKEN ALREADY!

Natsumi: You can't make me! Juice is over there chasing Atsuya! You have no one to make me do this dare…

NaCl: (massaging temples) Did I mention how much I hate stuck-up spoilt snobs?

Lil bro: You're gonna get it now, Natsumi…Ushishishi!

Kogure: …I'm not even going to bother…

NaCl: (waves hand) You think I can't do anything? For your knowledge, I am a writer, and a talented one at that! I have more imagination in my pinkie than you have in that empty space you call a brain! And you…have…just…insulted…me! (brings hand down)

_The floor Natsumi is standing on suddenly gives way, she barely manages to catch hold of the edge. The ground underneath her is packed with fanboys screaming her name and waving flags with her pictures…_

NaCl: (looks down at Natsumi, grinning evilly) So, beauty queen? You doubt the power of a writer? Well, let's see how much you enjoy being dropped into a sea of Natsumi fanboys! (starts bringing her foot down on Natsumi's clinging fingers)

Natsumi: (takes one fearful look at the fanboy sea) FINE! I'll do the stupid dare! Just don't make me fall into that sea!

NaCl: (snaps her fingers and the trapdoor closes) THEN EAT!

Lil bro: (looking worriedly at Miruuji) Hey, dude, are you sure you're okay?

Miruuji: I…am…going…to…kill…NaCl-san…

NaCl: Did someone say something?

Miruuji: (too innocent look) No…

Lil bro: Ha! Onee-chan was wrong! You are nowhere naïve and innocent…you are evil…and even more evil…

Natsumi: (eats chicken like a cave woman)

P.H.: (tapes the whole thing) Yeah! This is soo going on YouTube! I'm gonna name it 'Council Prez gone wild!'

Natsumi: W-WHAT?

NaCl: One more dare! Then we can go to sleep…Ahh blessed sleep~

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

3.14: (stops flirting with Midorikawa) Last dare from Hibisha! _'I dare you all to play Chinese whisper. The first sentence is "Burn is a pig-headed, lamebrain, stupid piece of shit." The game starts with Hiroto whispering this into Burn's ear while Burn doesn't know that the game is being played.'_

NaCl: HIBISHA, I'M GOING TO MURDER YOU!

Juice: (stops chasing Atsuya) Do it, Hiroto!

Hiroto: (gulps) O-okay…(goes up to Burn and whispers something in his ear)

Burn: (purple with rage) GRAN! YOU CALLED ME, THE TRUE CAPTAIN OF GENESIS, A PIG-HEADED, LAMEBRAIN, AND STUPID PIECE OF SHIT?

Hiroto: Umm…yes?

Burn: YOU ARE GOING TO PAY! (kicks soccer ball) ATOMIC FLARE!

_The soccer ball glows red and starts flaming, then hits Hiroto, slamming him into the wall, where he collapses…_

NaCl: (faints)

AuS: You really need to focus on controlling your temper, dear…

Juice: (sees total chaos) Well, peeps, thanks for watching! Now we will take a short commercial break! Be sure to get a Someoka Strawberry Special for a discount at Inazuma Ice! Thankies for watching! Lights off!

_The lights switch on to reveal…the same total chaos, except Juice, 3.14, P.H., and AuS all have circles under their eyes and strained smiles while lil bro is looking with an expression of amusement and Miruuji remains the hyper kid he was…_

* * *

><p>Juice: (forced smile) Welcome back to My Chemical Truth or Dare! Unfortunately, most of our cast is still…in varied states of oblivion, but I'm sure we'll have an amazing time! This batch of truths and dares was submitted by-<p>

Miruuji: ME!

Juice: (annoyed) Yes, by **Miruuji Emii**. Well, with no further ado, let's begin!

Miruuji: First truth! _'3.14, whom do you love?'_

Juice: (rolls her eyes) That's obvious! She loves Midori-chan of course!

3.14: (embarrassed) JUICE!

Midorikawa: JUICE-CHAN! MY NAME ISN'T MIDORI-CHAN!

Juice: (smirks) Sorry, NaCl has rubbed off on me…

AuS: Next truth! _'P.H., whom do YOU love?'_

P.H.: (red) Umm…

AuS: (evil smile) Our favorite vertically challenged mohawk freak with a stinking attitude!

P.H.: AUS!

Juice: (too innocent look) Were we not supposed to tell that you love Fudou?

P.H.: (turns slowly to Juice, dark aura slowly beginning to form)

Juice: Uhh…(starts running away) Hasta la vista, baby!

P.H.: I AM GOING TO GET REVENGE, JUICE! (chases her)

3.14: (rolls eyes) Those two… Well, next truth! _'NaCl and Hiroto, do you think you will marry someday and keep a steady relationship?_

AuS: Where are those lovebirds anyway?

3.14: LIKE I KNOW!

Miruuji: I have a headache…

Atsuya: (comes up) Has anyone told you that this show sucks?

_Suddenly everyone can feel a dark aura emitting from someplace…_

Unknown aura: Who…said…that…my…show…sucks…

Atsuya: (terrified)

Unknown aura: (starts laughing) Ushishishi!

Juice: NACL! WAS THAT YOU?

NaCl: (evil smile) Of course! You should have seen the expression on your face, pinkie, priceless~

Juice: (tapping her foot on the ground, dark aura forming) Can…we…get…back…to…THE SHOW?

NaCl: What~ever~

AuS: Now where is Hiroto?

Burn: (smirking) The same place I left him, my sweet…

Juice: (storms up to an unconscious Hiroto and dumps a pail of ice water on him)

Hiroto: (wakes up) AHH! I'm going to get pneumonia, you know…

Juice: Like I care…

P.H.: JUST ANSWER THE GODDAMN QUESTION!

Miruuji: So? Do you?

NaCl & Hiroto: Um…no…

Everyone: (staring shocked)

Miruuji: Wh-WHY?

Hiroto: Um…she… _how should I put this?_ …thinks another guy is hot…

Miruuji: SO? WHEN SHE SAID THAT ABOUT BURN AND GAZEL, YOU DIDN'T CARE! OR WHEN SHE SAID THAT TO FUDOU AND KIDOU!

Hiroto: (red as his hair) That was because they could give me no competition…but this new guy…he-(gets cut off by NaCl)

NaCl: (puts her hand on Hiroto's mouth and laughs nervously) I told you not to tell them, sweetheart…anyway the answer is no…

Everyone: (stares at them)

NaCl: (laughs nervously while sending Hiroto a death glare) Last truth! _'3.14 and PH, why do you have nicknames like that?'_

P.H. & 3.14: (groan) Oh, god…

NaCl: Ushishishi…

P.H.: Well…to tell the truth…my name is (blank) P. H. So, Juice, being the evil person she is, made that nickname…

Juice: (grins evilly) Mwahahahaha…

3.14: And…um…mine…my last name sounds a lot like Pi…so the numerical value of Pi is 3.14 …again made up by Juice…

Miruuji: Okay! On to the dares! _'I dare Lil bro to kiss Alex from __**Burn, Baby, Burn**__ and tell her he loves her...'_

Lil bro: (stops grinning evilly) Wh-WHAT?

Alex: (comes in) Did someone call me? (notices NaCl) …You…baka…

NaCl: (dark aura) You have no right to talk like that to me…I am your creator!

Alex: Like~I~care~

NaCl: (massages temples) Did I ever mention how much I hate my OCs?

P.H.: (sneaks up behind lil bro and pushes him) Here you go!

Lil bro: (lands on top of Alex, his lips on hers)

Alex: (slaps him) HOW DARE YOU!

Lil bro: Eto…it was a dare?

Alex: (dark aura)

NaCl: (pushes Alex out of the imagination door) I'm sorry but we don't have time to chat! Bye!

3.14: Next dare… _'I dare Lil bro to tell to the whole world he hates basketball.'_

Miruuji: (evil smile) Ushishishi! (holds up a camera) This special camera has a program that overrides all programs and broadcasts the video to every TV in the world that is on right now!

Everyone: YOU ARE EVIL!

NaCl: I totally misjudged you…

Miruuji: (too innocent look) What did I do?

3.14: Anyway…DO THE FREAKING DARE!

Lil bro: FINE! I…h-ha-hat-hate…ba-bas-bask-baske-basket-basketba-basketball…

Miruuji: (clicks send)

NaCl: EVIL~

P.H.: Can we finish this episode already? I have to study!

Juice: Me too!

AuS: Fine, next dare! _'I dare Endou to kiss Natsumi so I have a motive to kill him'_

NaCl: (burst out laughing) Kiss? Miruuji you are sooo innocent!

Miruuji: (dark aura) What did I do now?

NaCl: (smirking) Dude…in IE Go, they're MARRIED! And you do know what happens on a honeymoon, don't you?

Miruuji: (mouth wide open) Oh…My…God…

_Five minutes later, _

Natsumi: Miruuji! You don't have to murder him! (winces as a soccer ball hits a running Endou in the face) Never mind…

Lil bro: While Miruuji-san is busy over there… (cackles evilly) Next dare~ _'I dare NaCl to dance Caramelldansen on national TV.'_

NaCl: (splutters) EX-EXCUSE ME!

3.14: (bursts out laughing) OMG! Miruuji, you're hilarious!

Miruuji: (stops chasing Endou and holds up a camera) Start dancing, NaCl-san! Innocent, am I…

NaCl: (dances carmelldansen)

Lil bro: OMG! Priceless!

Hiroto: (starry-eyed) She looks cute…

Juice: You…are…a…freak…NaCl looks… (starts laughing)

NaCl: (stops dancing) I AM SO NEVER DOING THAT AGAIN!

P.H.: Next dare! _'I dare Ichinose to kiss Rika…on the lips…and we'll see what happens.'_

Ichinose: WHAT THE HELL?

NaCl: Oh no! (holds hands over ears) Either she's going to faint or go hyper…

Juice: (pushes Ichinose on top of Rika)

Ichinose: (kisses Rika)

Rika: (faints)

NaCl: (removes her hands from her ears) Ahh, thank god she fainted…

3.14: FINALLY! LAST DARE! THEN I CAN GO TO SLEEP! _'I dare Burn and Gazel to play the pocky game.'_

Burn & AuS: WHAT THE HELL!

Lil bro: Uh-oh…

Miruuji: What?

Lil bro: Gazel…is still…in the Sahara desert…

NaCl: WHICH IDIOT PUT GAZEL IN THE SAHARA DESERT!

Lil bro: IT WAS A DARE, YOU BAKAHEAD!

NaCl: YOU DARE CALL YOUR ONEE-CHAN A BAKAHEAD!

Lil bro: I DO! YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT!

NaCl: MY PROBLEM IS THAT YOU HAVE NO RESPECT FOR ME WHATSOEVER!

Miruuji: My god, these two can't stop fighting, can they…

Juice: AHH! I'll just get the godamn baka (opens imagination door and drags in an unconscious Gazel) WHO THE HELL SAID YOU COULD SLEEP? (throws a bucket of water on Gazel)

Gazel: (wakes up) AHH! COLD~~

Everyone else: (sweatdrop)

NaCl: (tosses them the pocky) Ready, steady, go~

Burn & Gazel: (play pocky game until..)

Burn: HA! I broke it!

3.14: YES! THE SHOW IS OVER! I'M GOING TO SLEEP!

NaCl: Thanks for watching this episode of My Chemical Truth or Dare! Stay tuned for more and send us your dares! (leaves)

Lil bro: You know...I have the strange feeling that I forgot something...

Gouenji: (inside fridge) Hello? SOMEBODY, GET ME OUTTA HERE!


	4. Episode 4: Alligators and Barney

**Episode Four: Alligators and Barney! **

_Lights switch on…and reveal four murderous girls, one sweetly smiling girl, an irritated boy, and a boy and a girl who are grinning evilly. All of them are ignoring the scuffles from the back room, as the show begins…_

NaCl: Welcome, dear fans, to another episode, of your favorite show, MY! CHEMICAL! TRUTH! OR! DARE!

Audience: (screams, whistles, claps, stomps feet)

NaCl: (taps microphone to restore order) Today, we have this awesome episode of Alligators and Barney!

Lil bro: As a disclaimer, NaCl does not own the IE Cast, whom she kidnapped/ bribed/ blackmailed, and the content of this show isn't suited for innocent children! That's all!

NaCl: Also, joining us today are Flo and Yuu, our two guest stars for this hilarious chapter!

Flo & Yuu: YEAH, IT'S AWESOME TO BE HERE!

Juice: (rubs her temples) Why are we always stuck with hyperactive guest stars?

Flo: (dark aura) WHAT WAS THAT?

NaCl: ANYWAY, let's get this show on the road! The first batch of dares was submitted by **IchiMai**!

Audience: (cheers)

Back Room: (boos)

P.H.: Our first dare is… _'I dare Hiroto to kiss...someone?'_

NaCl: S…someone? Couldn't you have said me?

Lil bro: …I thought you two didn't like each other any more…

NaCl: Who told you that? Of course I like him, it's just that I don't think we'll marry and have a steady relationship…uh, not necessarily in that order…

Juice: You two argue too much…HIROTO! GET YOUR BUTT OVER HERE!

Hiroto: (comes out of the back room) What, you ice-water-obsessed freak?

Juice: (dark aura) You have to kiss…someone…

Hiroto: (puzzled) Someone? Like who?

3.14: (loses her patience) SOMEONE! LIKE ANYONE! JUST CHOOSE, YOU BAKA! THE SOONER WE FINISH, THE SOONER I CAN LEAVE!

Hiroto: (stares at her) Are you PMS-ing or something?

3.14: (gets restrained by Juice and NaCl) JUST DO THE FREAKING DARE!

Flo: My god, Hiroto, just kiss your girlfriend!

Hiroto: (sees Flo) AHH! NO, ANYBODY BUT THIS BITCH! PLEASE TELL ME THAT THIS DEVIL ON EARTH ISN'T A GUEST STAR!

Yuu: (dark aura) That 'bitch' is my sister…

Hiroto: (starts hyperventilating) AHH! YUU TOO! NO, I'M GOING TO BE TORTURED! YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!

AuS: (watches with mild amusement) Oi, NaCl…I think he needs CPR…

NaCl: (kisses him) Hero-kun~

Hiroto: (stops hyperventilating, deepens kiss)

Everyone: (sweatdrop) Here we go again…

_Five minutes later…_

NaCl & Hiroto: (still kissing)

Flo: My god, how long does one dare take?

_Ten minutes later…_

NaCl & Hiroto: (Frenching)

Lil bro: WHY IS MY SISTER'S TONGUE IN HIROTO'S MOUTH?

Flo: (being restrained by Yuu and Ichinose) LET ME GO! I WANT TO MURDER HIM! MAKE HIM FEEL PAIN!

NaCl & Hiroto: (stop for breath, panting)

Juice: (dark aura) Finally! (pulls NaCl aways from Hiroto) We have a show to finish!

NaCl: (glares) Fine, next dare! _'I dare Kazemaru to cut his hair short and go to his fangirls!'_

Flo: (stops trying to kill Hiroto) Kaze-chan had fangirls? Really, I always thought they were fanboys… (evil smile)

Kazemaru: (runs after Flo) I AM NOT GAY!

Flo: (runs away, giggling) PROVE IT!

NaCl: (comes up to Yuu) How come you're not trying to kill Kazemaru?

Yuu: As much as I should go and save her from Kazemaru… (evil smile) She totally deserves it!

NaCl: Wow…you guys are as messed up as me and my little brother…

Yuu: Younger siblings are annoying, aren't they?

NaCl: (rolls eyes) Tell me about it…

Lil bro: (snickers) Looks like Yuu-senpai and onee-chan are hitting it off really well…

Hiroto: (murderous, stomps up to Yuu) Why are you so close to my girlfriend?

Yuu: (rolls eyes at Hiroto) Jeez, talk about overprotective, I'm just talking to her!

NaCl: (glares at Hiroto) Hero-kun, I thought we talked about this; you can't get jealous every time I talk to a boy!

Hiroto: (glares at NaCl) I know why this came up; it's all because of those damn Uchihas isn't it?

NaCl: (dark aura) We've discussed this, and I have the liberty to go out with any one I want, Hero-kun, you can't be all possessive of me!

Hiroto: (loses temper) OH, SO I CAN'T BE POSSESSIVE OF YOU, BUT YOU CAN YELL AND SCREAM AT MIDORIKAWA AND ULVIDA ALL YOU WANT, HUH?

NaCl: (loses temper) WHAT? I HATE MIDORI-CHAN FOR OTHER REASONS, NOT BECAUSE HE'S YOUR BEST FRIEND! AND SINCE WHEN DID I SCREAM AT ULVIDA?

Yuu: (confused) Uh…what in the world is going on?

NaCl & Hiroto: (screaming at each other)

Lil bro: See, ever since P.H. started going out with Genda-senpai instead of Fudou-senpai, NaCl and Hiroto have been getting into a lot of fights…

Flo & Kazemaru: (stop running because of NaCl & Hiroto's fight)

Flo: But what does that have to do with NaCl and Hiroto?

P.H.: Everything…you see, that was also the time when she fell in love with both Uchiha Sasuke and Uchiha Itachi…well, I can't blame her, they're both damn hot…

3.14: And everything started to go downhill from there…especially when P.H. started crushing on Gazel…NaCl and Hiroto had a big fight when Hiroto saw her getting pictures of Sasuke and Itachi…

AuS: Basically they have fights over possessiveness every hour nowadays…

Juice: It's a shame, they really did make a cute couple…but Hiroto has gotten even more watchful of her lately, and yells at her if she tells another boy 'hi', and NaCl screams at him how she can do whatever she wants to…

Hiroto: (still screaming) WELL THAN, IF YOU DON'T WANT ME, THEN YOU CAN GO TO THOSE UCHIHAS FOR ALL I CARE!

NaCl: (still screaming) AND YOU CAN GO BACK CRYING INTO MIDORI-CHAN'S ARMS ABOUT HOW I WAS THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER!

Hiroto: I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU SEE IN THEM, THEY'RE BOTH PILES OF TRASH!

NaCl: HOW COULD YOU? YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THEM IN YOUR LIFE, BAKA!

Hiroto: ABAZUREON'NA!

NaCl: KETSUNOANA!

Hiroto: YARIMAN!

NaCl: WHAT THE HELL? YOU CALLED ME A SLUT?

Hiroto: BECAUSE YOU ARE!

NaCl: YOU ARE SUCH A BASTARD! I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I LIKED YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

Hiroto: AND I DON'T KNOW WHY I STARTED DATING A BITCH LIKE YOU!

Flo: (holds her head) All this yelling is giving me a headache…

Juice: (holds out a pair of scissors to Kazemaru) Just cut your hair and go to your fangirls; maybe their screams will drown out NaCl and Hiroto…

_Kazemaru wordlessly takes the scissors and cuts off his hair just above his ponytail, his hair now falls to his neck, swaying in the breeze…He goes to the imagination room door, and opens it, managing one squeak before he gets dragged inside…_

NaCl: YOU WANT A SLUT? GO TO ULVIDA THEN!

Kazemaru: AHH! SOMEBODY SAVE ME!

Hiroto: WHY ARE YOU CALLING ULVIDA A SLUT! IT'S YOU WHO'S IN LOVE WITH THREE GUYS!

Fangirls: KYA~ OMG, KAZEMARU, YOU LOOK SO KAWAII! YOU SHOULD CUT YOUR HAIR MORE OFTEN! NO, DON'T RUN AWAY! COME BACK!

Kazemaru: ANYONE, SAVE ME! EVEN JUICE!

Juice: (dark aura) What does he mean, even Juice…?

Flo: Juice-san, please don't start yelling, we already have migraines…

NaCl: JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE A NEKO-MINI HAIRCUT-!

Fangirls: KAZEMARU IS OUR GOD!

Hiroto: JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE THE WRITER-!

Kazemaru: SOMEBODY SAVE ME! I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! I'M TOO INNOCENT TO HAVE SOME STRANGE GIRL LAP-DANCING ON ME, AND STRIP-TEASING IN FRONT OF ME!

Lil bro: (rolls eyes) Brilliant idea, Juice-san, maybe their screams will drown out NaCl and Hiroto…all it did was make it worse!

Juice: What's your brilliant idea, brat?

Lil bro: We can soundproof the fangirl room…

P.H.: Nice, I can see the resemblance between you and your sister…

Lil bro: And we can drop NaCl and Hiroto in the Sahara desert!

3.14: If it guarantees silence, I'd even murder both of them!

Juice: (snaps her fingers, fangirls' and Kazemaru's screams are cut off) Ha! I finally discovered how to work NaCl's imagination room…it was almost too easy to hack into the controls…

AuS: (covers head as the fight grows louder) Juice, do something about those two before my eardrums explode!

Juice: (snaps fingers again, NaCl and Hiroto disappear down a trapdoor to the Sahara desert) Great, they're taken care off! Now all we have to do is hope there are no truth or dares for Hiroto and NaCl…

Yuu: Well, while our ears recover from the noise, we bring the next dare! _'I dare Endou to stop saying 'Sakka Yarou Ze!''_

P.H.: Yes! A dare that shuts someone up instead of making them shout!

3.14: (tapes duct tape over Endou's mouth) The awesomeness of duct tape prevails!

Endou: Mmph mmu mmfma? (translation: what the hell?)

3.14: What? Every waking moment, the only thing that comes out of that mouth is Sakka Yaroze!

AuS: Ahh…next dare! (reads dare) Oh, no… (faints)

Flo: What's wrong with her? (reads dare) AHH, NO, THE WORLD IS GOING TO END!

Yuu: SHUT UP! (reads dare) Oh, my, god…

Juice: Would you bakas read aloud the freaking dare instead of hyperventilating! If you're not going to do it, then I will! _'I dare Ryuuji to use Astro Break on Hiroto!'_

3.14: Oh, no…I'm too young to die…

P.H.: (yells into a megaphone) EVACUATE THE AREA! WOMAN AND CHILDERN FIRST! PREPARE FOR NUCLEAR MISSILES! ICHIMAI, WHEN I FIND YOU, YOU ARE A DEAD WOMAN!

Lil bro: Why are you freaking out so much? All it says is that Midori-chan should kick a soccer ball at Hiroto…

Everyone: (freezes and stares at him)

Juice: (dumps ice water on AuS) Wake up! (turns to lil bro) Do you like not know your sister? This is MIDORI-CHAN kicking a soccer ball at HIROTO!

Lil bro: I still don't get what the big deal is (opens imagination door and drags in an unconscious Hiroto) WAKE UP, BAKA!

Juice: Allow me! (dumps pail of ice water on him)

Hiroto: (wakes up) AGH!

Flo: 3.14, call Midorikawa, will you?

3.14: No, Midori-chan, it's too soon for you to die!

Lil bro: (mutters) What a bunch of drama queens…

Midorikawa: Uh, Hiroto, don't take it personally…(kicks soccer ball) ASTRO BREAK!

_The ball hits Hiroto in the stomach and slams him against the wall. He collapses to the floor unconscious. Everyone holds their breath, terrified, as the seconds tick by…_

Lil bro: See! I told you nothing would happen!

Midorikawa: (hands in prayer position) Thank you Kami-sama, for making NaCl and Hiroto fight so that NaCl doesn't have the urge to launch nuclear warheads at me…

Lil bro: She would not have launched nuclear warheads! Besides, where would she have got it from?

Yuu: Garshield, of course!

Lil bro: (sweatdrop)

Flo: Let's move on before NaCl-san discovers… _'I dare someone who hates Barney to wear a Barney costume!'_

Juice: Now, who do we know that hates Barney…?

Everyone: (looks at Fubuki)

Fubuki: I DON'T HATE BARNEY! WHY DO ALL THE FREAKING BARNEY DARES GO TO ME?

Atsuya: (grins evilly) It's true…when he was little, he used to be terrified of Barney…he would hide in his room when the show came on!

Fubuki: (dark aura) Do you WANT to die again, Atsuya?

Atsuya: It's worth it!

Juice: (snaps her fingers) One Barney costume coming up!

_A bright light surrounds Fubuki, and when it disappears, a large purple dinosaur is seen in his place…_

Atsuya: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

3.14: (takes picture) This is so going up on facebook!

AuS: Next dare! _'I dare Gazelle-sama to kiss Burn!'_

AuS & P.H.: WHAT THE HELL?

Burn & Gazel: NO FUCKING WAY!

Juice: (inspects fingernails) Yes fucking way…unless you want to end up in the hospital with stitches…

Gazel: (as red as Burn's hair) Um… (goes and kisses Burn)

AuS & P.H.: (faint)

Burn/Gazel Fangirls: KAWAII!

Flo: Last dare from **IchiMai**! _'I dare Desarm to kill Endou!'_

Endou: Mmph mmu mmfph! (translation: What the fuck!)

Desarm: Why would I possible achieve from undertaking such an endeavor?

Maquia: MAQUIA HATES IT WHEN YOU DO THAT!

Desarm: Oh, I'm sorry, oh the delight of my eyes, I didn't know the agony that pierced your heart when I did such uncouth actions…

Maquia: THAT'S THE FINAL STRAW…PLATE! MAQUIA IS TOTALLY BREAKING UP WITH YOU!

Juice: How do you people just randomly pop out of the back room?

Desarm: I deeply regret the course that my actions have taken, this course should have been deeply planned out, now I have lost the fair maiden that I had called mine, now no more.

3.14: I don't know what the hell you're saying, but kill Endou already!

Desarm: I will accept this endeavor, but how shall I go about accomplishing this task?

3.14: (rubbing temples) Agh, just say that soccer sucks or something!

Desarm: Ahh that is the way…(turns to Endou) Dear comrade, the youthful sport that you call soccer, however enchanting it may seem, is in fact the most atrocious crime on this earth!

Endou: (has a heart attack and dies)

Juice: FINALLY IT'S OVE- (gets interrupted)

_The TV screens start blinking red as alarms sound, and a weird tinny voice is once again broadcast…_

Weird voice: We are sorry to interrupt this broadcast, but we have alarming news…THIS TIME THE WORLD REALLY IS GOING TO END! At this very moment, nuclear missiles are headed their way to the studios where My Chemical Truth or Dare is taking place, and if this show goes down, the millions of fangirls and fanboys around the world who are watching this will have heart attacks and die! And ther-

NaCl: Wow, my show is that popular?

Everyone: (stares at her)

Juice: WHY DID YOU LAUNCH NUCLEAR WARHEADS AT US?

NaCl: I didn't~

Juice: THEN WHO DID?

NaCl: HE DID! (points finger at audience)

Audience: (scramble out of the way of NaCl's incriminating finger)

_The spotlight shines down on the path created by NaCl's finger. As it moves further up the panicking audience, the TV screens start to countdown, showing twenty seconds to impact… Finally the light stops on…_

Barney: I LOVE YOU, YOU LOVE ME, WE'RE ALL ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY~

Fubuki: NOW YOU KNOW WHY I HATE BARNEY!

Juice: (loses temper) WHY THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO BLOW UP THE SHOW!

Barney: It's giving me less airtime…

NaCl: (goes up to Midorikawa and grins evilly) Hello, Midori-chan…

Midorikawa: NO! FLO, YUU! HELP!

Flo & Yuu: Calm down, NaCl, no need to get violent, no need to… (see NaCl punch Midorikawa in the face)

Midorikawa: (passes out)

NaCl: Revenge, sweet revenge~

Juice: I DON'T FREAKING CARE IF IT GIVES YOU LESS AIRTIME; YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO AIM NUCLEAR WEAPONS AT US!

_The countdown timer now shows ten seconds to impact…_

NaCl: We have a few technical issues to sort out… We'll be coming back shortly after a small commercial break!

* * *

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* * *

><p><em>The lights shine on again, to once more reveal the same chaos, that is now expected in this show…but this time, it's even worse… NaCl is watching with amusement the panicking audience and the disorder on the stage as small fights, chases, and yelling contests are breaking out… Juice and 3.14 are holding their heads, wincing as the noise levels grow higher… Lil bro is doing homework off in one corner… Flo is flirting with Ichinose as Domon and Gouenji try to hold back a jealous Rika and an overprotective Yuu… Fuyuka is crying over Endou's dead body…while Endou's ghost is trying to open the fangirl door to rescue Kazemaru…P.H. and AuS are still lying on the floor unconscious, as their boyfriends frantically apply CPR…you get the idea…<em>

NaCl: (too cheerful) Well, the commercial break is over! And we managed to get rid of the lunatic Barney and his nuclear missiles! However, there is still complete disorder, as you can see, but like always, the show must go on!

Everyone else: …

NaCl: (looks around her) As no one else is in a fit state to talk, I'll announce! The second batch of dares is sent in by **Floric1434**! Who has also graciously provided us with guest stars to liven up this show!

Juice: (loses temper) HOW THE HELL ARE YOU SO DAMN CHEERFUL!

NaCl: (smiles innocently) How's your headache?

Juice: (glares at NaCl) The sooner we finish, the sooner I can go home and relax…

3.14: I agree…come on, Juice, let's start…

Juice: The first dare is… _'Edgar, wear a nurse outfit'_

Edgar: WHAT THE HELL?

Juice: (loses temper) HOW THE HELL DO YOU GET OUT OF THE BACK ROOM?

Edgar: Uh…nobody's in the back room if you haven't noticed…

NaCl: Whatever, we need a nurse outfit…hmm, who has a nurse outfit…FUYUKA!

Fuyuka: (looks up from Endou) What?

NaCl: Give a nurse outfit to Edgar!

Fuyuka: Okay~ (gets nurse outfit) Here you go, Edgar-san!

Edgar: (wears nurse outfit) AHH! I LOOK LIKE A FREAK!

Yuu: (stops chasing Ichinose and starts chasing Edgar) HOW DID YOU GET TO WEAR FUYUKA'S CLOTHES BEFORE I DID?

Flo: (stops flirting with Ichinose) Since when did you become such a spaz, Yuu?

3.14: Let's just go on to the next dare… _'Endou…GO AND MEET DARK ENDOU'_

NaCl: Dark Endou? Who the hell is Dark Endou?

Juice: It doesn't matter…the fact is that Endou's dead…he can't meet someone when he's dead…

Flo: Fine, next dare! _'Kazemaru, run around in circles NON-STOP for 24 hours'_

NaCl: Now where is Kazemaru?

Juice: (evil smile) In the fangirl room…

NaCl: (raises eyebrows) And who put him there?

3.14: Don't you remember, NaCl? It was a dare and then you and Hiroto got all…(notices NaCl's slowly darkening aura)…never mind…

Juice: The question is…who's going to get him out…

NaCl, 3.14, Flo & Yuu: (look in other directions, whistling)

Juice: (dark aura) Fine then, your little brother will do it!

Lil bro: (looks up from homework) What?

NaCl: (loses temper…again) WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HOMEWORK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SHOW?

Lil bro: This show is lame…

NaCl: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SAID THAT! THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO WOULD KILL TO BE ON THIS SHOW AND WHEN YOU'RE HERE, YOU DO HOMEWORK?

Juice: Never mind that, just get Kaze-chan out of the fangirl room!

Lil bro: (evil smile) Make me…

_One minute later…_

Lil bro: I'M ONLY SAYING THIS ONE TIME! GET THE HELL OFF OF KAZEMARU OR I'M GOING TO CALL THE POLICE FOR UNDERAGE DRINKING!

_One second later, an unconscious Kazemaru and a bloody Lil bro, who has deep claw marks down one arm, are thrown out of the fangirl room…_

Juice: (too cheerful) See? You can do anything if you get proper motivation! I'm sure those little paper cuts will heal in no time!

Lil bro: (mutters) I'll give her motivation…

Juice: (sees Kazemaru) WHO THE HELL SAID THAT YOU COULD SLEEP? (dumps a pail of ice water on him)

Kazemaru: AGH! STOP DOING THAT WOMAN!

NaCl: Go run around in circles for 24 hours!

Kazemaru: WTF?

Juice: JUST DO IT!

Kazemaru: (starts running around in circles)

_One hour later…_

Kazemaru: (still running around in circles)

_One hour later…_

Kazemaru: (still running around in circles)

_One hour later…_

Kazemaru: (still running around in circles)

Flo: AHH JUST FAST FORWARD IN TIME LIKE NATSUMI'S GRANDSON DID!

NaCl: Fine…

_20 hours, 59 minutes, and 57 seconds later…_

NaCl: 3…2…1…stop!

Kazemaru: (faints)

Endou's ghost: (dies)

Flo: WTF, HOW CAN A GHOST DIE?

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

Yuu: (rubs temples) Let's just get it over with… _'Miyasaka, chase after Kazemaru'_

Miyasaka: (appears out of nowhere) But I can't chase him when he's unconscious…

NaCl: You're here…by the way, could you answer one question I've had for a very long time…

Miyasaka: What?

NaCl: Are you a girl or boy?

_Five minutes later…_

Lil bro: Sorry, **Floric1434**, that Miyasaka couldn't chase Kazemaru, but onee-chan's good enough, ne?

NaCl: (running away) YOU STILL DIDN'T ANSWER ME!

Miyasaka: (chasing her) YOU ARE GOING TO DIE, YOU BITCH!

3.14: (sighs) Will NaCl never learn? Well, on to the next dare! _'NaCl, get an alligator, train it and then make its jaw open really wide'_

NaCl: (snaps fingers and makes Miyasaka disappear down a trapdoor) WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO FIND AN ALLIGATOR!

Lil bro: In the Nile?

NaCl: (walks over to imagination door and opens it) Nile, huh…

_The door opens to reveal a long, curvy strip of rushing water, carrying many objects. The Nile is known as the longest river in the world, and is known for bringing prosperity to Egypt. The Nile empties into the Mediterranean Sea, and the annual floods enrich the plains of Egypt bringing much needed water for poor farmers. Also, the Nile is home to over-_

NaCl: OMG, STOP WITH THE GEOGRAPHY LESSON!

Juice: Just get a freaking alligator will you!

NaCl: (goes outside) Here alligator, here boy!

Everyone: (facepalms)

Lil bro: I am totally not related to that crazy woman…

_Five minutes later…_

NaCl: (comes back in with an alligator following her) I'm back!

Lil bro: (mutters) Pity…

NaCl: (continues) And I found an alligator! Minna, this is Greenie! (points to the brown alligator) Greenie, say hi!

Greenie: HI!

Flo: WTF, YOU CAN TALK!

Greenie: YES!

Juice: (rubs her head again) Great, another person who yells instead of talking…

Yuu: WHY THE HELL DID YOU NAME HIM GREENIE? HE'S BROWN FOR PETE'S SAKE! ARE YOU COLOR BLIND?

NaCl: (dark aura) No, I'm not color blind, and I didn't name him, Greenie's mom did…after all, weren't you named by your mom…

Yuu: (sweatdrop)

Greenie: UM, NACl-SAN, MOM SAID TO COME BACK FOR DINNER, SO COULD YOU, LIKE, GET ON WITH IT?

3.14: Dinner? OH NO HE'S GOING TO EAT US! (starts running in circles)

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

NaCl: (rubs her temples) Why can't any episode of this show go as planned…?

Lil bro: Oi, Greenie, you'll have to open your mouth really wide!

Greenie: WTF, I AM SO NOT DOING THAT!

Lil bro: YES YOU ARE!

Greenie: NO I AIN'T!

Lil bro: YES YOU ARE!

Greenie: MAKE ME!

NaCl: (sugary voice) Greenie, sweetie, can you please open your mouth really wide…I'll give you a snack! (holds up a human arm)

Everyone: (throws up)

Greenie: I DON'T WANNA!

NaCl: (dark aura) Do you want me to tell your mom about the time you went partying with your friends and drank the Mediterranean seawater?

Greenie: (opens his mouth really wide)

Flo: HOW THE HELL DID YOU BLACKMAIL AN ALLIGATOR?

Yuu: (sly smile) Are you jealous, Flo?

Flo: …

Juice: Okay, the last dare! _'Now Kabeyama, try fitting yourself in the gator's mouth'_

Kabeyama: NO! I HATE AMPHIBIANS OF ANY SORT!

Kogure: Ushishishi!

Greenie: AMPHIBIAN? I AM A FUCKING REPTILE!

Kabeyama: WHATEVER!

NaCl: (pushes Kabeyama so that he lands in Greenie's mouth) My god, just do the freaking dare…

Greenie: MMPH MMU MMFPH! (translation: What the fuck?)

Kabeyama: AHH! I'M GOING TO BE EATEN! YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!

Greenie: (swallows Kabeyama) AHH, THAT'S BETTER!

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

NaCl: (sees complete chaos…again) Alright, peoples, it's time again to end this beloved show…

3.14: I'm afraid we have a number of casualties during this show…

Lil bro: Firstly, Endou Mamoru, and Endou Mamoru's ghost have passed on to the other world (sniff) We shall always remember with fondness the way you said Sakka Yaroze!

Endou & Endou's ghost: (comes back to life) YEAH! SAKKA YAROZE!

Lil bro: I spoke too soon…

3.14: Secondly, Kabeyama was lost in the belly of an alligator…

Greenie: (pukes) AHH, HE'S TOO FAT!

Kabeyama: IMMA ALIVE!

NaCl: (dark aura) Thirdly, P.H. and AuS are yet to recover from their unconscious state will likely remain in a coma for the rest of their lif-

Burn & Gazel: (kiss them)

P.H. & AuS: (wake up)

NaCl: Uh, that's all! Minna, send some dares for torturing the IE cast, and welcome to the end of another successful episode of My Chemical Truth or Dare!

Juice: Lights off! See you soon!


End file.
